Title: Battery
Fandom: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Zack and Cloud, minor mention of Sephiroth
Word Count: 353
Rating: PG-13/R
Author's Notes: Yet more of the KuSeZa. I have to keep my claim alive. Inspired by the insanity of school, and as a (not so) clever means of displaying all of the background info that is in Chofi-verse. Watch the references to Got Your Back. I'm swiping stuff from everywhere. (sigh)


"All right. A group of three, each member with an EER of one-eighty-three over two-twelve--"

"They're not going to ask the fort question." Cloud sighed and slumped over the desk. Zack had been cramming him for hours. He hated Systems, but a Soldier's dependence on materia showed a need to study some physics along with regular combat classes.

"--and equipped with a second level grade materia attack a fortification of--"

"Zack!" Cloud yelled. "Come on! No more Systems! My brain's fried."

"Fine. History. Name the causes of the War of Thrones."

Cloud grabbed a pen and threw it at the Soldier. Zack ducked, of course, but Cloud needed the relief. He rattled off a list long ago memorized. "A disinterested imperial family, a nobility consolidating power, the rise of the samurai class to protect noble interests, the shinobi class's ideological loyalty to the emperor as the avatar of Omni, the mobility of the peasantry to the samurai and shinobi class, materia interests on imperial lands and their consolidation--"

"--and Empress Whats-Her-Face's sister got knocked up first," Zack said. "Okay, you're good for history." He snorted. "Like they even care. They just teach you all that shit to make sure you know that the evil Woots are backward fuckers." Zack smiled. "Okay. Something fun: name the incidents where a Soldier can promote cadets and infantry during or after battle. Make sure you give the differences for each Soldier class."

"Everyone knows that."

"Quit bitching and humor me, Spike."

"Okay, okay. Classes three to one can promote for exceptional valor resulting in battlefield injury that can be cured with higher-grade medicines and-or MDE's--"

"Define 'exceptional valor'."

"Stop being a hard ass, Zack."

"You want to pass, right?"

"It's only my life goal."

"So long as you know it isn't important."

"Fuck you, Zack."

"Once you finish studying. I'll get Seph here, too. It'll be a celebration screw. Now be a good boy and continue reading. We'll do some sparring later. The whole Cycle of Torture. It'll be fun."

"Like pulling my teeth out... or Systems class."

"That's the spirit!"